Ever wonder why you and your partner clash over raising the kids? It might boil down to your parenting styles. Clashing over discipline, schedules, or screen time is all too common.

But don’t worry — having different parenting styles doesn’t mean you’re doomed to constant conflict. There are four main parenting styles: authoritative, authoritarian, permissive, and uninvolved.

Authoritative parents are like the Goldilocks of parenting — not too strict, not too lax. They set clear rules but explain the reasons behind them. Authoritarian parents, on the other hand, are all about “because I said so.” Permissive parents are more like your cool aunt who lets you stay up late and eat ice cream for breakfast. And uninvolved parents? Well, they’re pretty hands-off, sometimes to a fault.

Understanding these styles can help you pinpoint where you and your partner differ and find common ground. It’s all about balance.

Communication is Key

When it comes to parenting styles, keeping those lines of communication open is crucial. Pick a moment when you’re both relaxed to have a heart-to-heart about your parenting philosophies. No kids around, no distractions — just you two.

Here’s the secret: active listening. When your partner’s talking, really tune in. Don’t interrupt or start playing the blame game. It’s not about who’s right or wrong; it’s about understanding each other’s perspectives.

Seek Common Ground

You and your partner might feel like you’re on different planets. But here’s the thing: you’re both trying to raise happy, healthy kids. Look for areas where you naturally complement each other. Maybe you’re the boundary-setter, while your partner’s the nurturing one. That’s not a clash — it’s a dream team. Identify these overlaps and celebrate them. It’s like finding puzzle pieces that fit perfectly.

Respectful Compromise

When it comes to parenting, there’s rarely a one-size-fits-all approach. You and your partner might have different ideas about bedtimes, discipline, or screen time. That’s okay. The key is to find a middle ground without compromising your core values. Start by acknowledging that both of you want what’s best for your kids. Then, be willing to bend a little.

Maybe you’re strict about bedtime, but your partner’s more relaxed. Consider meeting halfway — a slightly later bedtime on weekends, perhaps? Remember, it’s not about winning or losing. It’s about creating a unified front that works for your family. 

Learn Together

When you and your partner have different parenting styles, it’s the perfect opportunity to grow as a team. Turn those conflicts into learning experiences. Next time you disagree, take a step back and get curious. Ask your partner why they feel so strongly about their approach. You might discover some pretty interesting insights. And don’t forget to share your own thoughts, too. Remember, it’s not about who’s right or wrong. It’s about finding what works best for your family. 

Focus on Your Child’s Needs

When you’re butting heads with your partner over parenting styles, it’s easy to lose sight of what really matters. But your child’s well-being should always be the focus. Take a step back and ask yourself, “What does our child need right now?” Maybe it’s consistency, extra support, or just a big ol’ bear hug. Zeroing in on your child’s needs will help you find common ground with your partner. 

Seek Support When Needed

Parenting can be tough, especially when you’re not on the same page as your partner. Don’t be afraid to reach out for help when you’re feeling stuck. Talk to trusted friends or family members who’ve been through similar challenges. They might offer fresh perspectives or practical tips you hadn’t considered. Additionally, you can consult online parenting forums and support groups for advice and encouragement. Sometimes, just knowing you’re not alone in your struggles can make a world of difference.

If things are really tense, consider couples counseling or family therapy. A neutral third party can help you communicate more effectively and find common ground. Contact our office today to learn how we can help you in your parenting journey using SPACE parent training.